izzi blog

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Answer me one questions ‘Why is it that any time a woman breaks free from the conventional box society has placed her in, she inherits a degrading label’?  Is this fair? I believe not. If a woman succeeds in business or climbs the corporate ladder, she’s a bitch. If she looks 10 years younger than other women her age, she’s called a predator and so easily accused of having had plastic surgery or Botox. And now, taking it one step further, if she is in a relationship with a younger man she’s suddenly a “sugar mama” or more commonly known these days, as a “cougar.”

Linda Franklin Author and friend

Whilst I have been in the USA it seems that when ever I turn on the TV or pick up a magazine someone is talking about cougars. While I love that women over 40 are being brought into the spot light and the public domain,  I really think it is a tad vulgar and the story is more often, not being told the way it should be so when I was asked by my new friend, who I met on twitter Author Linda Franklin www.therealcougarwoman.com to take part in a TV interview, I did not hesitate. I was really thrilled that Sonia Kruger, www.zimbio.com/Sonia+Kruger host of the Australian version of ‘Dancing with the Stars’ was going to be interviewing me here in New York. Having people stop on 5th Avenue on both sides of the side walk to watch me being filmed walking down the street, made me feel like SJP and Alecia Keys ‘NEW YORK’ song was going through my head.

Sonia Kruger From Sunday Night & Anne Agoren from izzi bag

I am not actually one to put my private life into the spot light and somethings are definately between myself and my husband but I never forget just how lucky I am to have a husband younger than me, this is my second time around and I want to make it quite clear that I did not go out looking for a  young man, he found me. After the break up of my marriage I spent a long time on my own, licking my wounds and trying to figure out where it had all gone wrong. I actually to this day have not found the answer but meeting my current husband gave me the strength to trust a man again, to pick myself up, look in the mirror and say to my reflection  ‘Not bad for a woman over 40′. We are both very independant people not just finanacially but also in our careers, having said that when at home we are never apart, always supporting each other at events in my industry or in his, enjoy cooking or eating out. My friends are his friends and vice versa, our families have embraced us both equally and I am having the time of my life as most of you who read my blog already know.

So why did I decide to do this interview, well I think that the ancient word ‘Cougar Woman’ has a stigma attached to it of a ‘Sugar Mama’ or ‘man eating woman’ and often you would hear married woman say ‘Lock up your husbands’ the ‘Cougars’ are on the prowl. That is no longer true of a lot of single women over 40, I for one am not a ‘Sugar Mama’ my husband earns more than I do, although I am totally independant I do rely on my husband for lots of things, I never at anytime have felt like a cat on the prowl, the age difference does not come into our relationship, noone ever questions why are we together, or if they do never to my face.

I believe that a ‘Cougar Woman’ has a lot to offer a younger man, experience in all areas of life, not desperate to have a family at any cost, more settled in their own skin and most importantly not as insecure as a women in the 20′s or 30′s. Do not get me wrong I was not born over 40 I can say these things as I was once 20 and 30! Now I focus on the adventures that I have with someone that I love daily, I have a husband that does not come home, eat his dinner and fall asleep on the sofa in his PJ’s at 8.30pm. I have a husband who is full of life, encourages me in every aspect of my work and home life. Laughs with me at silly things, does not care if his dinner is not on the table at 6pm or if his suits are not back from the cleaners. So what does a younger man have to offer a ‘Cougar Woman’? well I guess girls for those of you under 40 and single you will just have to wait and see!

When I was in London recently I was asked to go to a dinner with a group called Footdown, I had very little understanding of what they did to be honest before the night. Here is their mission statement:

For leaders of all types of organisations, who dream of being better leaders but who lack the time to realise this ambition, Footdown’s leadership mentoring and coaching groups offer the chance to be better informed about what they do, more inspired about doing it and less isolated when things get tough.To find out more http://www.footdown.com/

Anyway on the night I had Mom staying with me so I made her get dressed up and on the town we went, she is a nutter my mom and game for a laugh, at 80 years old she is an inspiration to us all. If I have half the energy that woman has when I get there it will be a miracle. Jackie, my friend who invited me along, honored me by sitting us on the top table with Kriss Akabusi, everyone remembers him right?

In 1983 Akabusi embarked upon his athletics career as 400M hurdler and member of the 4x400M relay team, enjoying a successful time and winning three medals at the Summer Olympics and three World Championship medals, amongst others. In 1990 he broke David Hemery’s longstanding British record on his way to a Gold medal for the 400M hurdles at the European Championships.